cube.

Sticking with the theme of tv, I'm completely addicted to Entourage. I have seasons 1-3 downloaded thanks to a friend and I'm half way through the 2nd. It could never replace Curb however. And really that's all that needs to be said about that.

Now here comes the big life style change speech. It has to do with two main factors: my attitude and my alcohol intake.

My Attitude:

I assume most people who read this know me, (but if not you lurk out my life which is equally as fun as I read strangers blogs too) know that overall I'm a nice person. I'm never moody with my friends, I very rarely get angry and have never taken it out on anyone (boyfriends excluded), I keep my life very private as I am quite guarded. Well I indulge on silly things but never on the big stuff. A few select people know intense information about me, and that's great. I don't fear this info being spread (minus one case but that's a different story).

Ok tangent, let's streamline and get back to the point. So I'd like to think that I'm an all around nice person who treats people with the respect and dignity that they deserve. I'm not perfect, nor am I professing any sort of self righteous indignation (not this time at least) but something has come to my atention, something that has been on the back burner for most of my life, a sort of trend I perform that is getting out of control.

Like everyone ever, people have done shitty things to me. And I tend not to discuss this except with trustworthy parties. But here is the clencher, when someone does something shitty to me, I spin it around in my head and distort the idea placing the blame on myself. Then I ended up protecting and even defending the shitty party. Now an apology is one, and they are accepted whole-heartedly and I am a very forgiving person but I'm bloody sick of defending the these people who are in the wrong, or at least do something in a tactless way. I'm sick of protecting people who don't need it and shouldn't require it as it's obvious they wouldn't do the same for me.

I've resisted embarassment for one person in particular by absolving the fault on me, and even defending this person to an authority figure and I've got absolutely nothing to show for it. Actually I'm in the negative. I've defended this person for years now, and I'm sick of it. And I'm done.

Lifestyle change number 1: just stop. stop everything. if something comes of it then fine. if not. too bad.

My Alcohol Intake:

Red wine with dinner, red wine at the pub. It's becoming a slippery slope (not of alcoholism but with feeling terrible in the morning and bloating!!). So April is detox month. Minus this Friday for Pez's birthday I'm not drinking. I'm sick of feeling terrible the next day and being useless. I eat less but drink more. So on this assumption I will hopefully lose this liquor weight quickly.

Other than that, it's business as usual. I had a great weekend back in Birmingham for another friend's birthday where everyone was there. And the day after (being Sunday) I essentially polished off the platter of cheese that Chris' mother had prepared.